You’ll recall, of course, that The Scarecrow winds up not with a real heart, but with a testimonial—which does, however, tick regularly. (Think valve replacement, those of you familiar with that procedure.)

Well, it’s much the same here: as a token of my heartlessness, from time to time I’ve received testimonials. I’ll list these here, eventually—it’s a pretty low priority, to be honest—but for now, I’ll just refer back to the Wizard in closing: “Remember, my sentimental friend, that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others.”

That’s pretty deep. (And ethically dubious, in my view . . .)